BubbsPoetry

Question.. What would my problems look like if it was here? Would it wear horns and disguise itself as the flames that visited Moses? Show me where to go just to lead me off a cliff. That he promised that would give me the world as long as I trusted in him? Would it be like in elementary? Where tears soothed my wounds left by patches on my head? To be know as the girl that no one could love? Would it be dressed as me as I look in the mirror, yet never recognize who I was in company with? Only to put on more things that resembled celebrities that I couldn't relate to? Would it be dressed up as my husband? Where I couldn't resist saying yes to what i thought beautify actually mimicked? Would it be these things in my now, that i mistook for past me. Or who i thought i would become? I just have to remember that those problems don't exist. Only memories that are trying to resurface like zombies in thriller. I am letting anxiety take thrown as she so commonly doe...

I tried to be John. As I soaked in the tub. Hoping that my sins would get washed away with the suds. I begged for God to join me. Hoping that He would keep His garment on. So I could be the lady with the issue of blood. I mean the lady with the issue of validation. The lady with the issue of anger. The lady with the issue of pain. The lady with the issue of selfishness. Low self esteem. And everything else that equaled why I was pretending. So I could just touch Him. And be cleaned. Be healed. To not think of the thoughts that would lead to my death. So I could know that I wasn't alone, and not just be told. So I could feel His embrace. To feel something other than loneliness in a full room. So He could tell me that my faith had made me well. So my tears could leave down the drain to. So that Roman's 8:18 could be a reality. So that I can have congenital insensitivity to anything that does not bring me joy. I tried to be the one baptizing and getting bapt...

I used to sit and listen to you tell fables. As my young ears soaked in your tendencies. Smiled like Bozo as you made memories before they were even there. Just to doubt my mind as I remembered what never was. Yet I believed every dream you placed in my weak bed. Only to awake on the floor reaching for things to exist. And I believed you. Because you were all knowing, To a small human that trusted your arms to never let me fall. But to lay me down gently. Maybe that's why I tend to doubt God. I've been bruised. Then again. Maybe that's why I shouldn't. 

She is forbidden. Her fruit revealing what doesn't always make sense, But yet feels right. Like those that get left yielding for her. Waiting her approval. Like authorizations in pending status.  Wishing to be apart of her plan. Write a poem for her. Tell her all the reasons her glow birthed the sun. Her laughter like a ballad from the 90's. Tell her why you can't get enough. Her skin cocoa butter in its natural form. Her 4 eyes, making it more to love. Her curves you seem to bump into as you turn each corner. Reminding you of your favorite ride as a kid. She reminds you of childhood movies. Staying out late in the summertime. Raptar and courage Music videos on VHS. Innocence that is tainted,  Yet painted and sculpted to provide the perfect balance. Where scales align, Only to tilt when she is not there. When she is not yours. When you can get close enough to look, but not touch. She is hers too keep and yours to have for a moment. To give back to t...

I just want to talk with you. Pick your brain. To find words I can use to keep me strong. A garden full of colors. To stimulate my mind. Build my bones. That helps with my vision. Gives me energy. I just want to hold you. Pull you so close that we melt together. Like India, I can't tell where yours begin or mine end. Rub your sent within my pores. So any dog that comes sniffing would know that I belong to you. I just want to kiss you. My cocoa butter kisses. Smooth like the words you used for me to fall in love. I don't mine falling cause I know you'll catch me. At home in your arms. As you kiss me goodnight. And awake to do it all over again.  

Love rarely exist. Especially one like ours. Must not be humans.

I see why you hide your voice, Some words are too heavy to hold up after it leaves the tongue. Even air so thick hasn't lifted enough weights. So sentences get sliced just as the mind gets the courage. It would do more damage. To know all that goes on in the mental. That's why they lock those away. That dare to voice the sounds that don't even seem to make sense. That's why flies don't live too long. Why swats fly while doors get flown off of the hinges. And why anything you say will be used against you. You talk so low that a bat has to get close to hear.  That prophets can't predict. I see why you hide your voice. Show me your ways. So we can both protect our hearts from bleeding out. After being penetrated by words that could have been tucked away. Like childhood stories that still causes goosebumps. And games that left wonder. Let's keep them hidden,  Only to expose them when vulnerability creeps in while we're fighting to keep afloa...

Tell me what's going on in your mind.  Your dreams, ambitions, feelings, doubts, worries.  I'll put them in this Pringles can.  Stack them away for the days when you don't have much to say. I haven't collected enough.  You've kept them inside of other things. Said you had nothing.  Changed the subject before I could get out another word.  Do you not trust me? That I won't let anyone steal the moments when you're most vulnerable.  And share them with the world while you work to collect more.  Are you that good at hiding your emotions? While I can't seem to stop giving you everything that I have.  I'm sure your can is full.  You've started just leaving them out because nothing else fits.  From now on I'll try to just put them in mine. Right next to your two cents.